The Truth About Serial Dating

Picture your heart as a whole apple pie.  For every emotional entanglement (real or perceived), you are giving away a slice of that pie. If you do that consistently, what will be left for your dream man?

Image | Betty Crocker.com

Why Serial Dating is Damaging

Proverbs 4: 23 says: Guard your heart with all diligence, because out of it flow the issues of life.

When you are serial dating, you are not guarding your heart. 

Serial dating causes you to make yourself available for constant critiques. And it leaves you wondering “Does this guy like me?” “Why didn't he call me?” Etc. Etc. 

I serial dated in college.  But, after I started REALLY walking with Lord, I realized it was damaging to my self-esteem to spend my free time with random men.  So, I started to date with the intention of getting married.

How to Date Intentionally

·         Set Criteria -There are some eligibility requirements for dating you, Girl! And, every guy that winks at you is not eligible.

·         Date One Guy - Pop culture says to keep things loose until you discuss exclusivity. I reject that notion. Like or not, dating is a prequel to marriage. And, we all hope to be married to one man “happily ever after.” We should date that way too.

·         Introduce Him to Your Friends Early - They’ll pick up on red flags.  If you don’t want to introduce him to your friends, there is probably an issue that you are avoiding.  

·         Give Him the Man Test – Men know men.  So, introduce him to men that care about you i.e. your dad, brother, best friend’s husband, pastor, etc. They’ll be able to pick up on any signals that you are missing.

·         Work Together - Whether it’s volunteering at church or helping with a community project, learn how you work together. It will help you determine his character and your compatibility.

But, Simone, I’m not even dating?!

That was me too! I took a 3-year dating hiatus. And, during that time my walk with the Lord deepened and He healed past relationship wounds.

God wants a relationship with you more than anything. And, He may be blocking you from romance with a man…so that He can romance you. 

Hosea 2: 6-7 talks about this. It says:

Therefore I will block her path with thornbushes; I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way. She will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them. Then she will say, ‘I will go back to my husband as at first, for then I was better off than now.’

The Waiting Game

While waiting to date, I recommend you pray for your future husband. But, don’t just pray that he comes quickly. Pray for his protection, provision, and his safe passage.

Do you have questions or want more detail? Listen to the Let’s Talk Chat on Thursday, August 14^th at 7 PM EST. We’ll be discussing dating intentionally, courtship, and how to be ready for marriage. Register here. 

Can't wait to talk with you! Love, Simone